The whole room stopped and stared at me, wide-eyed. There was noticeable discomfort and awkwardness hanging in the air of the classroom.
It was Wednesday, and that meant Pharmacology: a graduate level class required of all grad students seeking a licensed as a therapist. We had been discussing ADHD when a fellow student spoke up about her struggles with having ADHD while in grad school with multiple to-do lists, multiple calendars, and having to re-read texts and re-write notes just to prepare for class.
“Yeah, but we all do that,” I responded out loud. That’s when the classroom went silent.
Thankfully it was a small group, and we were all close, so it was easy to break the tension with some humor.
Therapy Helped Me Grieve (and Grow)
While medication did make a huge difference in my life, the most transformation came from processing all of this in therapy. I began to process years of shame and confusion. Suddenly, patterns in my life made sense: why I sometimes shut down when overwhelmed, why I overcompensated by being hyper-productive in short bursts, or why I’d go from energized and inspired to deeply exhausted with nothing in between.
What surprised me most was how much grief came after the diagnosis. I began to revisit moments from my past: meltdowns, missed deadlines, emotional spirals, relationships where I always felt “too much.” I began to see them with compassion instead of criticism. I had to mourn the years I spent believing I was failing. I had to sit with the pain of not knowing sooner. Of wondering what might have been different if I’d had support earlier. Of realizing how much self-doubt I’d absorbed and called “normal.”
The Truth? I’m Still Figuring It Out
Some days, I still forget things. I still get overwhelmed. I still lose track of time. ADHD doesn’t disappear after diagnosis or medication. It just stops being the invisible figure I’m constantly wrestling. I don’t fight myself as much anymore. I work with my brain instead of against it. I’m more honest about what I need. I give myself permission to rest without guilt.
ADHD Is Real—Even If It’s Everywhere
But here’s what I learned: ADHD isn’t just about being forgetful or easily distracted. It’s about how your brain processes time, emotion, reward, and regulation. It’s about how you function under pressure, how you respond to boredom, how you manage transitions, how you process feedback, and so much more.
